Anger...

It is normal to feel angry towards our loved one for leaving us alone to face the world without them, but what about them? Do they feel Anger? They absolutely can, and can experience their Anger in many different ways.Life looks different on the other side, and while yes, they do feel anger, they do tend to come to a deeper understanding, sometimes rapidly due to the choice they make to understand their passing, and come to terms with their life choices, as well as their freedom to evolve, and to share a new, deeper understanding with you, whom they love so dearly.In the first few moments, its been my experience especially those of sudden deaths, like suicides or homicides, that they are to say the least, a bit angry. They are mad mostly at themselves for some of the life choices, unless on rare occasion, their family member has done wrong by them and has had some part in their decline.

One such time, I was on call for a biohazard cleanup crew, and received a call in the early evening to meet in the neighbouring town, as there had been a reported suicide by shotgun. I met my crew on location of a prestigious home. The air filled with an ominous presence of doom, lingering in the air like a thick blanket cloaking the street, filling us all with regret and sadness.As we arrived, the coroners were transporting the body into the ambulance, walking beside them was the man’s distraught daughter, muttering in disbelief.

Eventually, another family member arrived, and came over to me to thank me for being there to assist with the process of cleaning up their beloved father, who had taken his life after a massive stroke in one room, while his wife, lay on her recliner dying of bone cancer. Life for them in this moment was overwhelming, so much so he being his wife’s soul care giver saw no other way but to take his own life... The daughter, still standing beside me, sobbing quietly, I gave her an understand glance, and passed her a tissue, when she cleared her throat and asked me a very tough question. “How can you do this”? Pausing briefly before continuing, “Don’t get me wrong, I am more than grateful for your strength and courage to be here”, I moved closer to her, to offer my comfort, and said “I do this to offer a different side of compassion”. She reached out squeezing my hand. Over by the door, stood the other sister, who seemed a bit off, strange in the way of her reaction to be a bit out of place.

As the family, finally able to make their way off the property, we could begin the daunting task, of cleaning. As we prepped the house to begin, I could hear him banging around, and shouting. His Spirit came out of the room, and down the hall, now standing in front of me, I could see him as he was when he felt a bit more together. He adjusted his glasses, and said to me, “do you know, that she handed me the gun”? I raised my eyebrows, as he continued, thinking I couldn’t hear him. She was always bugging me for money, running our business into the ground, taking her mother’s pain pills, she thought I didn’t notice, but I did”. “I am sorry this has happened to you, can I help you in anyway” I questioned. A wave of anger rushed over me, causing me to feel dizzy, and called on my Angels to give me strength and protect me.

He ranted for about 3 hours, of his family dynamics and his situation. He was mad, he couldn’t save his wife, he was angry he fell ill, and he was angry mostly that he lost all control, having an overwhelming sense of sadness wash over me, what was I to do with all of this information? When he spoke up as though he could hear my thoughts, and said nothing, you can do nothing but pray for my wife to go quickly, and tell her I will be there when it’s all over.I was never able to tell his wife his message, due to the sensitive nature of the circumstances, I did however, ask her guardian Angels to intervene on my behalf, and send her the message in a manner it would be received well. For me personally, I don’t believe in making people feel uncomfortable, nor did I want to cause their family undue pain, as they had already been through so much.

That moment changed how I understood death, and my gifts, I gained respect for the Spirit, as I understood that they go through the same stages we do, and let me tell you it’s intense, just as intense as it is for you, and for me.A few short weeks later, He came back for a short visit, thanking me for being there in his darkest moments, and that he found his peace.

He said Life looks differently over there, and he gained insight into his life, and the dynamics, he also reported that his wife received the messages through a dream, but had not yet joined him.For us left behind, it can take years for that same understanding, trust the process, and know that you are so loved, and the last thing your loved ones want to do is cause you pain. They wish you peace, love and understanding. They want you to know they are still with you, for as long as it takes for you to make your way through this very important stage. You need to see, in order to understand, and you are a result of thought, and as a result you experience all that you are, because of your thoughts.

So once you are able to work past this uncomfortable part of feeling Angry, but it will take as long as it takes because this is your journey and you are allowed all the time it takes you, but remember do not stay here too long, for you have important work ahead of you.

.ma